Sleep regression. Just when you think your little one has got his bed and night time routine sorted, something happens to knock it all out of the park and all your hard work is gone. Night time tears, no leaving the room until they’re alseep and 2 am wake ups. Like most parents, we have had a few of those in the last three years, the most recent being in January just before I gave birth to Little L’s sister.
Too exhausted with caring for a newborn, I put off sleep training L for weeks – months – saying I would get onto it as soon as Baby M were sleeping longer in the night. I was shattered, in fact so tired that the toddler often climbed into bed with me in the middle of the night, and I let him stay there.
But a few weeks ago, I decided enough was enough. Baby M was sleeping through the night and I really had no excuse. Personally, I was fed up of sometimes spending up to 1 hour waiting for him to fall asleep. We had tried various methods in the past – controlled crying (so horrible to hear I didn’t think I could do it again) and gradual regression, where every few days I moved further away from his bed. It seems the latter is more successful with toddlers and so I tried that again.
Given I had spent night after night sitting on a pullout chair beside his bed, I decided the next step would be to sit in the middle of the room. I did that for three nights then moved further away. This went on until I was just on the other side of his bedroom door (which was open), ready to console him if he cried. It seemed to work as he got used to me no longer being next to him as he fell asleep. My mistake however was to lie on the sofabed next to him if he woke during the night. Purely for selfish tiredness reasons. So to really make this round of sleep training work, I decided to sleep on the corridor floor outside his room if he woke up during the night. Not the most comfortable but an investment for the future is what I repeatedly told myself. He would still cry and I would console him, and he even got out of his bed a few times to check I was there. I kept quiet, with the odd ‘back to bed now’ and he did it. I wouldn’t say we are fully there yet – he will still moan a bit if he wakes up at night, but two days ago I managed to tuck him back in, say a few comforting words from outside his bedroom door, and then go back to my bed.
It’s tough work and so many times I was tempted to give up, but I just persevered. I now have a toddler happy to fall asleep by himself and my evenings back – no small feat.
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